Do Age Based Goals Set Us Up For Disappointment?

There is no expiration date on your dreams.

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Take a quick look at your life. Are you where you thought you would be? Maybe the answer is yes, or maybe the answer is no. Either way, does it really matter if you are not where you envisioned you’d be if you’re living a happy life?

I am 24, still living in my parents’ house, and single (shocking). My teenage self, or even who I was just a few years ago, would be gasping with immense shock if she heard this. When I was younger, I envisioned a life filled with marriage, maybe a kid, and a dream home all by the age of 25. But now here we are two months into 2023, and news flash — I have none of those things. There’s a definitely a rude awakening happening for the teenage version of myself. With a little less than one year until I turn 25, I realized I have yet to accomplish any of the life goals I set out for myself as a young adult. On the other hand, I live a very joyous life filled with loving family, fun friends, and a promising, passion filled career. So, is it really the end of the world if I’m not where I thought I would be at this age?

In one of my favorite books, Maybe You Should Talk To Someone, the author begins her career as a writer for a hit television show and ends up as a licensed therapist down the road. She also gets dumped by the man she thought she was going to marry, but that’s beside the point. Was her goal in her early life to become a therapist? No, but it ended up being the fulfilling piece of the pie she was desperately searching for. Although her road to therapy was windy and filled with roadblocks along the way, it fuels what she believed her life purpose is.

So, the simple answer to my question is no. There is no way to dictate what life throws our way or when. Change is inevitable and learning to be okay with that is the major key. Often times, it’s hard to understand why we are put in certain situations or why we are dealt the cards we are dealt, thus completely derailing the future we envisioned for ourselves. At the end of the day, whether you believe in God, the universe or lucky number 13 — the reality is, everyone’s life is predestined. The heartbreaking, earth shattering, what’s-best-for-you moments will come and change all of our plans. And that’s okay.

One of the biggest life lessons I have learned while dealing with the heartbreaking end of a long term relationship is that everything works out the way it is supposed to. Fast forward to current day — I realized that the age based goals and expectations I set for myself is not what I even want in my mid-twenties. Always remember: through the muddy waters eventually comes clarity.

Did anything in this newsletter speak to you? Leave a comment below and let me know. Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!

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